A Walk

I went for a walk in the woods. I jogged the first quarter-mile or so. My age and weight told on me. I grew tired but was determined to finish the walk. Since I was listening to music on my phone and tired I somehow lost track of where I was.

The trails where I walked are well-marked but I was still confused. I was looking at a suburban roadway through the trees and had never seen that from the trail before. Above the still nude trees it grew cloudy. The wind grew cold.

For a moment I felt very old. I am only 43, but I imagined myself 40 years older. Imagined myself 83 and alone and confused in the cold woods.

Then I thought, keep walking, dumbass, and get over it. And I did.

When I was done I paused and took this photo by the rushing, cold, brown river. I was thinking of the NO OUTLET sign by my house, where I usually make jokey self-portraits. Thinking, illogically, fuck you, pal.